Before this streak, I hadn’t really taken my practice 100% seriously. I have had my ups and downs and my personal best was about 45 days.
But I think after around 6 weeks into this I started to feel different. I felt less anxious and more aligned with myself and my life purpose.
It was like I embodied a lot of teachings and skills that I had picked up during the years.
Especially my non-cumming practice.
It has become more clear that I need to embody experiences and learnings to truly integrate them into me. Otherwise I just in my head and make my decisions from there. Without feeling that in my body or in my core. I just feel that I am more in my body than ever before and this long steak has really got me back into my body. It feels like I can calibrate people and the world better and, that is when a transmission is true and real.
It is not only coming from the head.
I feel calmer in general, more centered and grounded.
I have no need to show off or impress anyone.
I feel that this is who I am, what I have become and this is what you get.
But at the same time, I feel an openness to hear feedback and there is more room for me to improve and to be better in any way.
My life purpose is also something that has become more important to me and it is super clear. I am putting more resources and time into it.
But also the understanding that things take time and I don’t need to stress about things to happen immediately.
Talking about stress, I am less stressed about things I can’t control.
I have looked into stoicism for many years and it makes a big difference when I have embodied that philosophy. To actually feel it, like with so many other things now.
This practice has also made a difference in how I interact sexually.
The extreme horniness became more subtle and I didn't have to chase that urge.
If would be in a situation where I would get compromised and there is a great risk for me to cum. I just pass that down, without any particular regrets or FOMO.
This has become more important than sex.
I am currently in this mindset that I have no intention of cumming and I have not even had it on the menu for the past 200 days. I have just taken that part away without compromise. Don’t have to mindfuck about that.
That was the thing I needed to take out of my life to gain all these benefits.
I can rant all day about how much of an impact this has had on my life.
But what I can say is that it didn’t become real until I made this into a part of my life.
I have my next milestone 365 days and I will not celebrate that with an ejaculation.
I wish you all good luck in your own journey.
It is worth the sacrifice and that is how magic works.
You need to let something go for something else to appear.
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